My Ex Has Made Our Child Believe That I’m Bad & Mean for Speaking to Our Child About Their Inappropriate Actions or Behaviors. Why Am I Being Punished for Parenting?

Alienating parents may use the other parent's normal behavior and reactions against them as a tactic to manipulate the child's perception and create a negative image of the other parent. This behavior is often part of a larger strategy known as parental alienation, where one parent seeks to undermine the child's relationship with the other parent. Here are some reasons why alienating parents may use this tactic:

1. Control and Power: By portraying the other parent as a bad or mean parent, the alienating parent can exert control over the child's and behaviors. This power dynamic allows the alienating parent to influence the child's thoughts and feelings towards the other parent.

2. Justification for Alienation: By highlighting normal parental behavior and reactions in a negative light, the alienating parent may justify their actions of alienating the child from the other parent. They may use these instances to validate their manipulation and portray themselves as the victim in the situation.

3. Projection of Guilt: Alienating parents may project their own feelings of guilt, resentment, or anger onto the other parent. By exaggerating or distorting the other parent's actions, they shift the focus away from their own behavior and create a narrative that justifies their alienating tactics.

4. Isolation and Loyalty: Alienating parents may aim to isolate the child from the other parent by creating a sense of loyalty and allegiance towards themselves. By painting the other parent in a negative light, they attempt to erode the child's trust and bond with the targeted parent, reinforcing dependency on the alienating parent.

5. Manipulative Control: Using normal behavior and reactions against the other parent allows the alienating parent to manipulate the child's emotions and perceptions. This manipulation can instill fear, doubt, and confusion in the child, making them more susceptible to the alienating parent's influence.

It's important for the targeted parent to recognize these manipulative tactics. Establishing clear boundaries, maintaining documentation, and focusing on the child's needs are essential strategies in combating parental alienation dynamics.